Light-work

Lightwork Announces the "Beaver Awards"

At Light-work lodge we pride ourselves on extolling the virtues of sensible solutions pursued with diligence. No wonder Mr. Beaver is our esteemed mascot. So it seems fitting (indeed, sensible) that we would enjoy a brief beaverian respite from chewing on the weightier issues that constitute our normal fare here at L-W. Let's recognize the all-around good sense of some consumer products by conferring on them a "Beaver."

The fact that we are in the middle of the feeding frenzy we call the holiday shopping season certainly makes our work timely. For example, some find this sentiment perfectly reasonable: "For my birthday, I want everyone to celebrate by gaining weight, going in debt, and acquiring lots of stuff." For them, the Beaver's winners circle will serve as a fine place to locate exceptional stuff worthy of such a celebration. (By the way, if you think there is something flawed in the sentiment above, perhaps you are a good candidate to explore this post.)

I won't reveal the winners just yet. First, I want to help you appreciate the rigor with which our judging staff has approached the challenge of identifying products of surpassing value. Let me tell you about a product that didn't make it. The fact that this is an offering of such high and obvious merit ought to illustrate the standards beyond which one must excel to win a coveted Beaver.

The Fish Agility Training Set immediately caught the eye of our ever-vigilant product scouts. What better way to spend your days than in assisting "Goldie" to get more nimble! We found the text that accompanied the ad especially moving:

This complete set of underwater activities allows you to train your pet fish to perform a series of agility maneuvers, including swimming through hoops, pushing a soccer ball, navigating a slalom course, and more. ...With the included soccer goal, basketball hoop, and football goalpost, you can train your pet to practice scoring goals, slam dunks, or field goals.

Naturally, we were skeptical about whether a fish has the "RIGHT STUFF" for slam dunks - but we sought to keep an open mind. We also questioned the amount of time required to achieve this level of agility. I'm not trying to belabor the obvious, but isn't the use of fins a detriment to dunking the ball? If not, why haven't we seen more extensive use of fins in the NBA? Is fin assisted dunking possibly "the next big thing" to shake up the game?

I contacted customer service of the vendor with my inquiries about "how much time will it take before Goldie can slam dunk?" The customer service rep was not able to answer my questions so she conferred with the technical services department. I guess "how long does it take" is more of a technical question. They were unable to locate any answers in their product manuals and guides. I asked if anyone had actually trained a fish using the kit - they answered that this was a product that had been demonstrated, but not actually tested. My bright hopes for Goldie's future as the next Michael Jordan were dimmed.

After watching this clip of "Comet," a dean's list graduate of Fish Agility University, my aspirations for Goldie briefly flickered to life. Alas, Comet was unavailable for comment to the question, "How long did it take you to learn this?" Hence an unassailable cloud of uncertainty hangs over the Fish Agility Training set. If you are going to waste time training a fish in the execution of maneuvers of dubious value, you have a right to know whether hours, days, or months will be the measure of that waste. Who could dwell in joy in the looming shadow of such unmeasured pointlessness? Comet is impressive (especially with the extremely cool music) but his gym is not ready for a Beaver.

Instead of Boring People With The Truth

J Budziszewski (representing "professor theophilus") has written an engaging book for the collegiate who wants to secure a bachelors degree without losing his commitment to Christ. Ask Me Anything 2 is an account of "the conversational adventures of Professor M. E. Theophilus, holder of the PMS (Pre-Modern Studies) Chair in the School of Antinomianism at Post Everything University."

Anyone using the time tested "fly on the wall" learning strategy will find himself profitably listening-in on the Professor. For example, how often does Lactantius come up for discussion among YOUR circle of friends? He is the early Christian apologist who said this:

Religion cannot be imposed by force. The matter must be carried on by words rather than blows, that the will may be affected. Let them unsheath the weapon of their intellect; if their system is true, let it be asserted. For we do not entice, as they say; but we teach, we prove, we show.  ...For nothing is so much a matter of free-will as religion; in which, if the mind of the worshipper is disinclined to it, religion is at once taken away, and ceases to exist.

This book is a little quirky in its approach. But I like it! The fact that something is the truth does not justify using it to bore people. Ask me Anything 2 is a gurgling mountain stream of conversation laced with glimmering nuggets of truth. It is both interesting and will do you good.

Prayer That Packs a Punch

This verse ought to take your breath away:  “If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you” (John 15:7). The speaker is Jesus and He is making a stunning offer. He, the Lord of the Universe, will put "whatever you wish" on His personal to-do list. You don't get a better prayer guarantee than this.

So what's the catch? It's captured in two conditional clauses that precede the promise: (1) "If you abide in me," and (2) "[if] My words abide in you." The promise is only relevant to those who meet these two prerequisites: They must be living "in Jesus" and His words must be living in them. Jesus is describing someone whose entire approach to life is defined by a devotion to Jesus and His Word.

The reward ("Jesus will do whatever you wish") is too great for us to ignore the prerequisite. So how, exactly, can we meet it? Here is one practical step: Learn how to pray "Word driven prayers." These are prayers that are informed by what the Bible says. They are NOT a mere dressing up of personal desires in Bible lingo. They ARE prayers which use the Bible to identify Jesus' desires and then declare, "That's what I want. too." In John 15:7, Jesus is describing the power of prayer when a man's (or woman's) heart beats in unison with His.

I have prepared a little booklet called "Only by the Hand of God," which gives you some examples of these kinds of prayers. Click here to download a copy. It uses Scripture to identify the things that matter to Jesus and express those desires in simple prayers tailored to different situations. This is NOT a prayer book - but an illustration of a kind of praying that occurs when the Word abides in us and leaks out in our prayers, the kinds of prayers of which Jesus says, "Now that's a prayer I want to answer."

What Scrooge McDuck Thinks of the Bailout

Duck Tales was the first Disney cartoon series produced for syndication. 100 episodes aired between Sept. 11, 1987, and May 6, 1990. I remember watching one striking episode with my (at the time) young sons about exponential expansion of the money supply. (Yea, I know - this was supposed to be a kid's cartoon - but I really liked this episode!) The Mises Institute, has assembled some poignant excerpts to provide a handy guide for anyone who wants to study what Huey, Dewey, and Louie learned about money. With the "multi-phonic duplicator" currently running at full speed, are we getting closer to hearing mom's say, "Wipe your feet kids, I don't want you tracking in a bunch of money again?"